Joe Lycett(Live at The Apollo season12 episode6) ①
こんにちは。
今回は、Joe Lycett(ジョー・ライセット)のライブを取りあげます。イギリス・バーミンガム出身。まだ30歳ですが皮肉めいたコメントはイギリスらしい感じがします。彼の出身地であるバーミンガムはイスラムの人が多い地域で有名なのですが、このイスラムにちなんだネタが結構でてきます。かなりセンシティブな話題ですが、、、。
自分が住んでいたことがあるロンドンも相当数のイスラムの方がいるように思いましたが、バーミンガムに住まれている方によると、本当にイスラムの人達一色の地区があるようですね。
あとコメディには全然関係ですが、彼はpansexual(全能愛主義者)のようです。
今回取り上げるのは、以下のライブです。
<引用>
Hammersmith Apollo, again, everyone!
Give me an "Ooh!"
Ooh!
Give me an "A-ha-ha-ha".
A-ha-ha-ha.
Very nice. Let me hear you say, "Hell, yeah!"
Hell, yeah!
And then, as camp*1 as you can, give me an, "Oh, no".
Oh, no.
You shook your head.
"I'm not going to do a camp thing".
Give yourselves a round of applause!
That's good. Hello.
So, right, I broke my elbow.
Did you? I did.
I got into a fight.
You should see the other guy.
She's fine. She's back at school.
I don't want to talk about it.
Cos, you know, I just want to keep it low key*2.
That's why I wore this sling*3
I made a sling out of silver!
What I've realised is, I'm not going to be able to get up now.
I've really shat myself*4.
up here, haven't I?
"I made a sling out of silver!"
あまり見せたくない（keep it low key）と言いながらも、派手な銀の包帯をしているところがちょっとした洒落ということでしょうか。加えて、派手な包帯をみて、大便をもらしそうなぐらいびびったそうです。
Right
So, do you know,
I want to talk about Birmingham.
I am from Birmingham.
Anyone from Birmingham in?
Oh, loads of*5 you. Hello, welcome.
I know I don't have the accent.
I know. I just never had it.
I am
I, er, was watching Fox News the other week.
The reputable*6 news source that is Fox News!
"The reputable news source that is Fox News!"
評判の良いFox Newsということは、評判が悪いということですね＾＾；。
And they described Birmingham as "100% Muslim".
Salaam-Alaikum*7.
Alaikum-Salaam is what you say back, but don't worry, we will work it out.
I was interested in that, because "100% Muslim", they said.
It is a sort of truth.
冒頭にも書きましたが、Biringhamはイギリスの中でも相当、イスラムの方が多い地区のようです。 100%がイスラム人というFox Newsの表現もある種真実だと言っています。
There is a lot of Muslims in Birmingham.
There is a lot of all cultures there.
We are known for being multicultural.
One of the most famous Muslims in Birmingham is Malala Yousafzai.
I don't know if people are familiar with her?
Yes, she's brilliant.
She's an 18-year-old school girl who was shot at by the Taliban for wanting to be educated.
She now goes to Edgbaston High School for Girls.
It is a private school.
I don't think she pays the fees.
I, personally, would hate to go to school with Malala Yousafzai.
Can you imagine
Show and Tell Day*8, with Malala?
"OK, class,
what have you brought in?"
"Sally, let's start with you."
And Sally goes,
"I've brought in a papier mache cat*9 that I made".
"OK, um,
anyone else bring anything in?
"Malala, did you bring anything in?"
"This Nobel Peace Prize."
"Sally! You're a piece of shit*10 to that.
What they are saying is that we should be worried about that, that there is something terrifying, frightening about Muslims.
I think we have got a problem. I think we are using the word "Muslim" far too quickly to describe people doing atrocities*11, when they do not represent
Muslims any more than I do.
I think we should be using a more accurate word for those people, which I am going to argue is "knobhead".
テロリスト≒イスラムの人々というような風潮があるので、テロリストをknobhead(愚か者 or 男性の大事なところ)と呼ぶことを提案しています。 日本でも暴走族を珍走団と呼ぼうという流れがあったけど、これはひどい＾＾；。
It's a political rally*12 now.
There would be levels of*13 knobhead*14.
You would have a moderate knobhead, all the way up to fundamental knobhead.
And if we all did it, the news would have to catch up.
They would have to go, "Today, two knobheads bombed a car."
They would have to do it.
And it wouldn't necessarily be to do with terrorist activity.
Not just that.
Any knobheady activity would get the knobhead word.
I have thought of some.
People that wear a festival wristband after a festival.
Ugh! The worst!
"I went to Reading*15."
It's November, you're in a Costa! You're a knobhead!
Couples that put a lock on a bridge.
You are both knobheads, sorry!
Hate that! Hate it!
Sanctimonious*16 mothers.
I have to be careful here.
I don't mean all mothers, by any means*17.
Just a lot of my friends are having kids at the minute*18.
It's the sort of mothers that go,
"Don't tell me how to raise my kids."
And you're like, "OK, but she IS trying to eat a petits filous*19 "with an electric razor, so "You're a bit of a knobhead, aren't you?!
Knobheadな行為の例として、母親が子供にヨーグルトを電動髭剃りで食べさせることを挙げていますね。明らかに愚かな行為かと思いますが、、、ジョークの意味が理解できていません。シェービングクリームをヨーグルトに置き換えてるイメージでしょうか。
Just ever so slightly."
Amanda Holden*20 - fundamental knobhead.
I just don't like her.
I don't like her.
Don't encourage me, because I am sure she is lovely.
But I think she's despicable*21.
No, I don't have a problem with Muslims in Birmingham, at all.
Happy to have them. I think they add to our city and to our culture.
I think the big problem we have in Birmingham is happening around the country, actually.
We have a lot of artisan*22 coffee shops.
You know the sort of places I am on about.
Shoreditch is full of them.
shoreditchはロンドン東部にある若者やアーティストが集まる地域ですね。
Kind of, like, distressed*23 wood.
That kind of thing.
And they serve flat whites and they will say things like, "We support local artists."
And you know that, cos the art on the wall is shit.
白い板を用意してあげて、建前上、我々は本地域のアーティストをサポートしますというが、本音は、壁の落書きが酷すぎるからやめてくれということでしょうか。
Dozens. Dozens in Birmingham.
They are all shit.
No, there is one I quite like.
I cannot say the name, for legal reasons.
They do an avocado and feta smash*24.
It's a very aggressive word, I feel,
for what is, essentially, pressing with a fork.
Avocado and feta smash!
And for 1-1.50 extra,
you can get a poached*25 egg on top.
It is a lovely way to start the day.
I went in recently and I said to the girl, "I'd like the avocado and feta smash, please, "with the poached egg."
And she went, "Oh.
"We don't do the egg any more."
I said, "Why's that?" And she went,
"The kitchen was struggling to cope."
When I hear the phrase"struggling to cope", I think of, I don't know, a single mother, trying to juggle*26 a career, childcare, heartbreak*27.
I don't think of someone cooking a fucking egg*28.
I am boycotting*29 them now.
I am boycotting them.
後半に続きます。
*1:camp:なよなよした、風変わりな
*2:low key:穏やかな、控えめな
*3:sling:つり包帯
*4:shit oneself:大便をもらしそうなぐらいびびる
*5:loads of: たくさんの
*6:reputable:評判の良い
*7:Salaam-Alaikum:イスラム語の挨拶。peace be upon youの意味。会う時、別れる時の使う
*8:show and tell day:生徒が自分の持ち物を持参して、それを他の生徒に見せながら話をする日
*9:papier mache cat:張り子の猫
*10:a piece of shit:くだらないもの(crap)))."
"This Nobel Peace Prize"
Joeは、マララ・ユサフサイと同じクラスになりたくないと言っています。その空想話として、show and tell dayでサリーが張り子の猫を紹介した後、ユサフサイがノーベル平和賞を紹介した話を挙げてますね。 確かに、ノーベル平和賞と比較したらすべてものが霞むで見えますね。
I'd hate to be a teacher, as well.
You're not going to tell Malala off for anything.
"What are you doing with that phone?"
"Texting Barack Obama,
actually, so"
"Oh, sorry.
"Um, Sally you're a piece of shit."
また、今度は自分せ先生となる空想話として、マララが携帯をいじっているので注意すると、オバマ大統領にメッセージを送っていると答えるシーンを話に挙げています。そりゃ先生やりにくわ。
その上、サリーにUm, Sally you're a piece of shit、と完全に八つ当たりしています＾＾；。
このサリーをオチに被せてくるやり方は、日本では良く見ますが海外でも使われるようですね。
Poor Sally. No, I made her up.
No, I was annoyed about that.
I was annoyed when they said we were 100% Muslim, cos when they say things like that, there is a subtext((subtext: 話の流れの背後
*11:atrocity:残虐行為、暴力行為
*12:political rally: 政治集団
*13:levels of：幾つかのレベルの
*14:knobhead:愚か者、陰茎亀頭
*15:reading:ロンドン郊外の都市。イギリスのレディングとリーズで毎年8月末に野外ロックが行われ、レディング&リーズ・フィスティバルと呼ばれる。
*16:Sanctimonious：信心深げな
*17:not ・・・ by any means:決して～でない
*18:at the minute:今、現在
*19:petits filous: 商品名、子供向けのヨーグルト
*20:Amanda Holden:イギリスのTVプレゼンテータ。
*21:despicable：卑劣な
*22:artisan:職人、職工
*23:distressed:困った
*24:an avocado and feta smash:チーズとアボガドを混ぜた料理
*25:poach:ゆでる
*26:juggle:複数のことをうまくやりこなす
*27:heartbreak:傷心
*28:fucking:いまいましい、ひどい
*29:boycott:商品の購買を拒否する
